lirazel: ([tv] believe in me)
[personal profile] lirazel
Fic: take whatever you need to take and leave the rest
Chapters:
1/1
Fandom: The Pitt (TV)
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Melissa “Mel” King & Frank Langdon, Becca King & Melissa “Mel” King, Becca King & Frank Langdon
Characters: Frank Langdon, Melissa “Mel” King, Becca King, Michael “Robby” Robinavitch, Baran Al-Hashimi
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, well just slightly, set during season 2, branches off after episode 5, who is mel going to trust to treat her sister?, do you really need to ask?, frank needs someone to trust him, mel needs someone to reassure her, good thing they’re in the same space again
Summary:

“I’ll look her over,” Robby says.

“Um, thank you,” Mel says. “But, um, can Dr. Langdon do it?”

Frank isn’t sure which is more gratifying: Mel’s request or the expression on Robby’s face.

“Oh, we want Ms. King to have the very best care,” Robby says, voice a bit tight behind the jocularity. “She’s family, after all. I think I can spare a few minutes to make sure she’s okay.”

Fuck him. Frank’s hand flexes just as Mel’s jaw tightens. Becca’s eyes are darting around anxiously and she’s flapping both of her hands now.

“I appreciate that,” Mel says. “But I’d like Dr. Langdon to be the one to treat her.”

Her voice is steely in a way that Frank hasn’t heard from her before, her eyes fierce as she holds Robby’s gaze. A little shudder passes through Frank and he sucks in a deep breath even as he fights to keep his face neutral.

(no subject)

Feb. 24th, 2026 10:45 am
lirazel: Hideko and Sookhee from The Handmaiden ([film] my tamako my sookhee)
[personal profile] lirazel
So yeah, I finished Stone Butch Blues last week and I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. I had braced myself for endless suffering, and there was so much suffering, but I am still so glad I read it.

There was almost nothing in it I related to (except being very pro-union lol) and much that I found perplexing (mostly the sex stuff--no shock there--and some of the ideas about gender that are quite dated but important), but I also learned a ton. I struggled with the first few chapters because I found the prose too...simple? That's not the right word. It just wasn't stylistically what I enjoy. Too many short sentences in a row. But I came to appreciate it as a way of evoking the voice of a working-class, (formally) uneducated woman who is struggling to find her place in the world.

The episodic nature of the book creates its own rhythm; it's essentially a book about a woman finding community and/or stability, then losing it (often in incredibly violent circumstances), sinking into depression, then fighting for it again, repeat repeat repeat. Jess and her friends are living their lives in a constant state of danger, and they know it. Most of the violence comes from the state (the police are the truest villains in the book) or through the powers of capital. It's a communist book, though it's not as overtly communist as I kind of expected being familiar with Leslie's politics and life. I thought it did a great job of handling the political stuff. I was particularly moved by the queerplatonic relationship between Jess and her neighbor, who is a transwoman, and I think it's significant that after a book about Jess trying to find a sexual/romantic partnership that works for her, the (hopeful) ending is found in this friendship and work in labor organizing. Community is complicated and messy but absolutely vital and the lines between romantic/sexual relationships, friendships, solidarity partnerships, etc. are blurred in ways that I think is really realistic.

I appreciated talking about this book in community with a bunch of queer women/nonbinary folks, and I was fascinated by the very different ways that we read Jess's gender identity in particular. Jess didn't fit into the categories offered by the time in which she was living (late 50s through late 70s), but even though we have a lot more categories and labels now, I don't think she really fits into any of them either, which I really appreciated.

Shoutout to the two scenes that made me cry:
the fire where Jess loses everything and the scene where she goes to the institution to visit the older butch who had inspired her as a kid. That last one TORE ME UP
.

So yes, I have now read an important queer novel, and I'm glad I did.

April's question a day meme questions

Feb. 24th, 2026 10:10 am
kazzy_cee: (Default)
[personal profile] kazzy_cee
Under the cut for April's questions.

Read more... )

Previous months can be found in my sticky post here.

request for recipes

Feb. 23rd, 2026 06:55 pm
snickfic: Buffy looking over her shoulder (Default)
[personal profile] snickfic
I would like to bulk up my store of recipes that travel and reheat well and are good for taking to other people, the "casserole for someone who's ill/grieving/up all night with a newborn" kind of thing. Casseroles and hearty soups are welcome, but also other kinds of one-dish meals that don't require much fiddling other than reheating.

In return, I can offer one of my own that fits this description:
White chicken chili

Heated Rivalry and Murderbot

Feb. 23rd, 2026 04:47 pm
snickfic: retro art with text: rocket power (mood sf)
[personal profile] snickfic
In which I’m ambivalent about several fandom-favorite shows. Oh boy!

Heated Rivalry. It was wild watching a hockey romance on my screen after writing ~350k of hockey romance fic. Literally on the tv I could see writers addressing and working within the same logistical constraints all us hockey RPFers do! And this is a show that knows hockey. From the very beginning with the joint ad shoot, I knew I was in good hands. Maybe my favorite nerdy moment of the whole show was towards the end where they’re discussing how to get Ilya on a different team, and Shane straight up starts laying out the salary cap considerations. In bed! Extremely hot of him!

I couldn’t help but think about how it must be even wilder to watch if you’re a closeted NHL player. Like damn. I was crying at the big climactic scene in ep 5, as a queer unathletic woman in her 40s; imagine what that must be like to someone who actually plays the sport and lives that environment every day. I think I saw something about a juniors player(?) coming out recently and citing the show as being part of his inspiration, and just, man.

So did I like it? Well, I enjoyed watching it and would watch it again (except probably not episode three; I feel for Scott but the whole romcom thing about murdered me, and I have negative interest in Kip). I love Ilya to little tiny pieces, and I think Connor Storrie did an incredible job with him. That “deadpan on the outside, dying on the inside” kind of character is catnip. The show also made me cry big fat tears twice, which basically never happens. I’m weak for musical cues, but actually crying over a movie or tv or book is extremely rare for me.

On the other hand, I think Shane is a much weaker character, with very little external to react to compared to Ilya’s family troubles. The entire core of Shane’s character is being anxious about things that mostly haven’t happened yet, which is difficult to build a narrative arc around. I also don’t think Hudson Williams is as strong an actor as Storrie, but it’s honestly hard to say when the material he’s working with is so much weaker. I feel like it's particularly rough because he's so clearly a Sidney Crosby expy, and Sid is so much more interesting a person than Shane is. If Shane had more Sid in him (the leadership in the room, the thoughtful and very proactive team caretaking, the weird random nerdy obsessions), I would like him a lot more.

Also, I’m sorry to say but I got bored of the sex after a while. 🙈 When it comes to live action sex scenes, less is more for me, I guess? I do appreciate, as I saw someone comment, that the show made it extremely clear what everyone’s dicks were doing at all times, even though we basically never see them.

Overall, a fun time! Not mad I saw it. Not sure it really needs a second season, when it feels like it already told the whole story, but I guess we’ll see.

--

Murderbot. I read the first book a while back and was unimpressed, but I thought a change in medium might address a lot of my issues with it, specifically a sense of worldbuilding and adding more depth to the characters, even if only by being played by real live people. And indeed, I do think the show was an improvement on that score. The live actors, the flashbacks, and the necessity of building sets all added a lot to make this feel like a real world that people live in.

To be honest, the real reason I wanted to watch the show was because I really like David Dastmalchian and because Gurathin was the most interesting character in the book after Murderbot, and I was extremely well fed on those counts. The expansion of Gurathin’s character added a lot to him, to the show, and especially to the relationship with Murderbot. Holy shit, it’s like they revamped him specifically as shipbait. spoiler cut for those that need it )

On the other hand, the show retains a lot of the weird tonal dissonance present in the book, and without the excuse of Murderbot as an unreliable narrator. I think Martha Wells probably has politics similar to mine, and I'm confident that her representation of the extremely queer, communal society of PreservationAux was meant to be a positive one, but what we see on screen often feels like it's making a joke at the team's expense. Ratthi and Arada are the worst, because they always feel like they're about fourteen years old, but everyone on the team frequently comes across as naïve, sheltered, and neither capable of nor interested in emotionally grappling with the reality of the world they live in. The way they are loudly protective of local fauna that has repeatedly tried to kill them or threatened their lives is a good example. They come across as parodies of people who hold their professed values, rather than serious examples of what those values might look like in practice.

The exception, for better and for worse, is Gurathin, an outsider who has joined their community only recently, barely buys into most of their practices, and notably is never the butt of the joke.

And like, I recognize that this is a relatively light-hearted show! Some of my very dearest tv shows and movies are ones that mix silliness with heart, like Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the Guardians of the Galaxy movies. I think I still haven't fully figured out why this rubs me the wrong way, when those don't.

All that didn't prevent me from enjoying it overall, though. I laughed a lot. I also thought Skarsgard did great. I've not liked him before, but tbf that was in Infinity Pool and The Northman, and it's possible I hated those in general and not because of him. Anyway, I think the more he gets to be a weird little (big) guy, the better he is, so he's great as Murderbot.

And unlike Heated Rivalry, this is clearly dying for a second season. I'm glad it's been renewed.

Candy Hearts creator reveals!

Feb. 21st, 2026 05:31 pm
snickfic: (Oasis walkon)
[personal profile] snickfic
A week before the CH deadline, I thought I might have to default on my assignment. I had literally no words and no energy to try to make some. But at the last minute I got a nice, easy, short idea and wrote it in two days, and I was really happy with it. And then somehow in the three days before reveals I wrote two more things! Huh! And also a separate thing for Bulletproof!

for the man who has everything, Oasis RPF, Liam/Noel, 1400 words. 5 times Liam flirted with Noel during the reunion tour, and one time he didn't have to. I WAS NOT going to sign up for CH this year, but a request turned up for Liam/Noel at the very last minute, and I could not possibly refuse. (I've decided that I'm allowed to break my no-signups rule for Oasis requests. It's not like there are lots of them!)

This feels like a spiritual sibling to my vignettes fic from last year, although not in the same continuity. That fic was about their slow relationship rebuild leading up to tour, while this is about rebuilding during the tour, but in both cases it's a lot of short scenes that string together into a bigger whole, relatively sparsely written. This one leans a lot harder on specific canon events, partly because the period during the tour gave us all way more to work with than the period before (which is mostly a total mystery to this day!).

I didn't think I had another of those in me, but once I had the idea the day before the deadline, it all flowed really smoothly. I wrote the last scene and was like "this is way too soppy and cheesy, I'll need to rewrite it," but then I came later to edit and decided it had exactly the right amount of cheese, actually! FEELINGS.

--

14 Capra, Drowning by Numbers (1988), Cissie/Cissie/Cissie/Madgett, 800 words. It happened like this: on a Saturday afternoon, Cissie, Cissie, and Cissie agreed it was time for an experiment.

This movie had been on my radar for a while, I think because I'd seen a Yuletide promo for it? I was motivated to finally watch it when a CH request came up for pinch hit. It's a deeply weird, surrealist meditation on death featuring three women named Cissie and also starring Bernard Hill, and after I finished I was like, "I definitely cannot write fic for this." Then I went to take a shower, had not even gotten into the shower yet when the first line came to me, and I put my clothes back on, sat down, and wrote the whole thing in half an hour.

The fic is partly a "for want of a nail" fix-it of canon, and partly simply a fill for the prompt of the Cissies taking turns with Madgett. I think of all the fic I've written, it's probably one of the least comprehensible for reading canon-blind. I had fun, though, and christened the fandom tag, which is always nice. And the recipient seemed to really like it, which is the most gratifying part of writing something super niche. <3

--

full-service, The Housemaid, Millie/Nina, 2100 words. The obligatory post-canon cunnilingus fic, as you do.

This movie ended with such interesting possibilities for these two, and I knew my friend lioness was requesting them for CH, but what really got me to write this was that there were two entire fics in the fandom tag and neither for this ship. ;___; I wrote it all in a rush over two days, and I think it kind of shows, but I had fun, and maybe people will see the vision and write more of them. I would definitely read more about Millie's post-canon exploits and how her relationship with Nina evolves.

--

tea in the moonlight, The Endless, Aaron/Justin, 1700 words. The red flower knocks Aaron up, with Justin's assistance, and they have to decide what to do about it.

I had about 200 words of this for the Bulletproof tag "complicated but ultimately positive feelings about incestuous mpregnancy," one of maybe half a dozen Bulletproof false starts this year. I didn't think it was going to go anywhere, but after I finished the Housemaid fic, it turned out I still had energy left over, and I wrote the rest of it and posted it that same day.

I didn't end up gifting it to anyone, so as one of exactly twelve fics in the fandom tag, it hasn't gotten much attention. Now I'm kind of second-guessing posting it at all, or at least posting so soon without letting it sit for a while and giving it another editing pass. It's not remotely on the same level as my other Endless fic. OTOH I do really like the weird incesty mpreg feelings in it. IDK.

Candy Hearts recs

Feb. 21st, 2026 12:29 pm
snickfic: Danvers and Navarro with their backs to each other, looking down (TD Danvers/Navarro)
[personal profile] snickfic
A few recs before author reveals! (And then a reveals post tonight lol.)

First, my gifts! Both for True Detective: Night Country.
The Near Horizon, Danvers & Navarro, 3k. Danvers has a new mystery to solve, and sometimes, if she stands in the right place and looks in the right direction, Navarro might show up and give her information about it. A post-canon fic with some lovely lines, great Danvers voice, and some of that same ambiguity we saw in canon re: exactly what the heck the end of Navarro's story was.

the mercy of eternity, Danvers/Navarro, 500 words. Navarro is unmoored in time, and it's up to Danvers to anchor her again. I really like the nonlinear approach here and how it lets the reader feel as disoriented as the character.

And some other favorites:
role models, Heated Rivalry, OMC/OMC with background Shane/Ilya, 7k. A wrenching and then hopeful look at two young hockey players navigating what it means to be queer while looking up to still-closeted Shane and Ilya. Lovely, probably readable canon-blind.

down, down, down, Original Work, Final Girl/Female Serial Killer, 900 words. After all the serial killing, the final girl has a lot she's not telling. I'm in awe of how much the author packs into such a short fic. Weird, chewy, fucky, A+.

Bridging the Divide, Wake Up Dead Man, Vera Draven & Grace Wicks, 4k. Vera meets a ghost, and then keeps coming back to meet her again. I think of everyone in the movie, these two got the shortest end of the stick and the least restitution for it, and this is so satisfying, as Grace gets to be herself in her own words, and they're able to sympathize with each other. It's not so much hurt/comfort as it is just two people being seen who desperately needed it, and it's so beautifully and delicately told.
snickfic: Gale Weathers from Scream 1 (Scream)
[personal profile] snickfic
Wuthering Heights (2026). Young woman is torn between her love for the best friend she grew up with and her wealthy new-money neighbor.

I enjoyed this a lot. Emerald Fennell's visual spectacle is always on point, and in particular the costumes and sets are fantastic. There are a bunch of amazing set pieces, and the artificiality of Linton's mansion and the wardrobe he gives Cathy vs the organic squalor of her home and childhood were really effective IMO in contrasting several different binaries at once. I loved every single ridiculous dress. I was also really into Cathy and Heathcliff's starcrossed love. Heathcliff is so gone on her, and even when he's trying to be manipulative, he mostly comes across as desperate. (When he approaches Linton's ward Isabela in hopes of making Cathy jealous, he is the most gentlemanly ravisher you have ever met.) And Cathy is clearly equally gone on him, even if she gets in her own way sometimes.

I think the script could have used some work. For one thing, several secondary characters' motivations were left as exercises to the viewer (Cathy's father and especially her companion Nelly); like yes, I can form theories about why they did what they did, but maybe a little less subtlety here is in order. Also, just to make Cathy and Heathcliff feel a bit more complex as characters and/or to just make their relationship more toxic or at least complicated. Honestly, my main criticism here is that Fennell, against all expectations and especially considering her work on Saltburn, doesn't go nearly as weird and batshit as the story could support. The visuals yes, the character dynamics no.

Overall, though, a good time. I ship it and immediately went looking for fic. (There were 15 fics in the tag, half from before the movie even came out, and half the new ones were crossovers. RIP.)

--

The Tunnel (2011). An Australian mockumentary about a news crew that goes into abandoned subway tunnels underneath Sydney looking for a story.

I'm always interested in mockumentary horror, as opposed to your standard found footage, so I was excited to check this out. Unfortunately, the longer I sit with it, the less I like it. First of all, the whole point of the mockumentary aspect is to add depth, context, and contrast to the found footage, but IMO the interview clips here were almost extraneous. There were one or two nice moments, like when they have the anchor listen for the first time to what another crew member in the tunnels had heard through his head phones, but there was very little else that we couldn't have gotten from the found footage itself. The news investigation framing all felt a little off as well; the supposed pretext for going into the tunnels feels a little overheated. "Politicians fail to give updates on big proposal" does not feel like the red flag for a huge scandal, and various other aspects that were treated as potentially newsworthy just weren't, IMO. Also, surely the most terrifying part of underground horror is the threat of getting lost? I was astounded by how little a concern this was in the movie, even when they were running around without any care whatsoever for where they were.

What really killed this for me, though, was the gender politics. As with so many found footage type movies, there's one female character, the news anchor, and everyone else is male. (Why is this????) There are repeated assertions from the guys both in the found footage and the interview segments that the anchor doesn't know what she's doing, doesn't deserve her position, and probably is fucking the station director. And what do you know, they're right, several people die because of her ambition and poor judgment, not to mention how she goes into crying hysterics several times. In 2011!! Just brutal.

There's a behind the scenes doc about the movie that I managed to watch five minutes of, and before I turned it off, it was entirely about what genius fundraisers the creators were, and how they "disrupted" the Australian film funding model by "inventing NFTs before they were big." (They raised funds by ~selling frames of the movie to donors.) So... yeah.

The movie isn't entirely without merit; there's some great found footage moments. If you just want to watch people stumble around underground being chased by unknown monsters, you could do worse. But a very qualified rec.

--

Prince of Darkness (1987). Per Shudder, this John Carpenter movie "follows a group of quantum physics students in Los Angeles who are asked to assist a Catholic priest in investigating an ancient cylinder of liquid discovered in a monastery, which they come to find is a sentient, liquid embodiment of Satan."

NGL, I watched this because I really really wanted to see a movie about the liquid embodiment of Satan, and now I have, I guess. This was just bad. There are some memorable moments; I loved the dripping fluid floating upwards and that the canister (OF FLUID) was locked to "only open from the inside." The dream transmissions for the future were honestly rad. The bugs and creepy-crawlies everwhere were really effective sometimes. There's also a fun sense of claustrophobia as the night goes on and things close in around the characters. Also, frankly, the devil and Jesus as extraterrestials who came to take over and warn Earth, respectively, was neat! I wish the movie had gone harder on that!

OTOH, the eventual romance began with the guy being such a creeper that I was sure he was being set up as a villain, and then he's a big old sexist to her right before he asks her out, and I hated that. The demon instapregnancy was so predictable and tedious. One of the guys repeatedly has homophobic comments made to and by him, and also he's weirdly racist to one of the girls, and this is all for no apparent reason except as a characterization note. And overall the movie was just slow and lacking in charm. I would love to see this exact premise from someone who was actually good at writing characters.

I definitely wouldn't recommend this to anyone unless they were interested in specific elements of the plot or if they're a John Carpenter completionist.

An exhibition all about the Samurai

Feb. 19th, 2026 06:11 pm
kazzy_cee: (Default)
[personal profile] kazzy_cee
Yesterday was a chilly day here in the South East of the UK, but we braved the freezing cold wind and lower temperatures (4ºC/39ºF, although it felt colder) and headed out to the train station. We walked up to the British Museum from Charing Cross station. It's about a mile, so it took about 20 minutes, as we had to stop frequently to wait for the traffic lights to change on all the roads.

The exhibition charted the history of the Samurai from its beginnings as a fierce warrior class known as 'bushi' in the medieval period, which moved on to gain political standing by the 1100s. This then moved on to become an elite social class from the early 1600s.  By the late 19th century, the hereditary status of the Samurai was abolished, and the 'way of the warrior' (bushido) became the driving force behind their military exploits. By the 20th century, the myth of the Samurai had become idealised and crossed over into the West, where it was incorporated into film and graphic novels, and even influenced fashion.

There were a lot of exhibits ranging from armour, weapons, art, everyday items, woodblock prints, and examples of how the Samurai lived and governed during the height of their power, right up to the way the myths still influence present-day Japan and beyond.
IMG_5692.jpeg
Noguchi Tetsuya Duck and Man mixed media sculpture (2025), more of what caught my eye under the cut!
Read more... )

I've hardly touched on what was in the exhibition - it's a fascinating and very detailed history of the samurai, and well worth visiting. It closes on 4th May.

(no subject)

Feb. 17th, 2026 09:10 am
lirazel: The Dag from Mad Max: Fury Road in blue and grey ([film] desert witch mystic)
[personal profile] lirazel
This is totally random, but I've had something on my mind lately and I realized that the people who could most likely answer my questions are...on my flist!

Some context: when I was still a Christian, I spent a lot of time appreciating the tradition of religious sisters and how that was a lifestyle it was possible to pursue. It just really made me feel good to know that there was this long tradition of women who chose to pursue faith and/or education instead of wifehood/motherhood/family/sex. You could step outside of that and you had a society-sanctioned option to become a nun, spend your life in a community of other women, and sometimes pursue an education or the arts. (Obviously I don't want to idealize life in a religious community, which could be abusive or poverty-stricken as the case may be. But so could marriage!)

Judaism is SO different and more family-focused (for understandable reasons), so I've kind of been missing that, especially since I've been thinking a lot about female mystics lately for Ann Lee reasons (though I am NOT mystic in any way at all and in fact am pretty anti-mystic in both my personality and experience, I find it endlessly fascinating). Were there different points or places in Jewish history, say, pre-19th century, in which women could pursue a different kind of life? Or, even if they married, is there a mystic tradition among Jewish women? I have the vaguest ideas about Jewish mysticism, but I only know it in the context of men.

Or is there something similar in Islam? I know there are Buddhist nuns, but I know little of that either.

I've been thinking a lot about the ways that female mystics in Christianity are both honored and seen as operating within a well-established tradition but also always dangerous and threatening to the power structure and the ways in which they kind of teeter between something that the masculine authorities approve of because they can use it (mostly to prove the power of God) and want to tamp down on because it threatens them, and how the women themselves are just concerned about their relationship with God and sometimes other women, and how complicated all that is. It's just really rich, and I've sort of wanted to write some speculative fiction inspired by it, but I want to draw from wider sources than just Christian ones and I don't know where to start!

I want to be clear that I'm looking for women operating within a patriarchal religion. Obviously there have been women religious figures throughout history--priestesses, shamans, etc.--who wielded great power, both religious and otherwise. Lots of that up to the present day in indigenous religions! And they are super interesting! I want to learn more about them at some point! But right now I'm looking for women who are inhabiting that weird place where them devoting their life to a religion with a male power structure is sanctioned by the larger society, but what they do with that might not be. And women whose experience of that religion is distinctly more mystical/untamed/transcendent than most people's. Give me some women who are married to the divine!

links

Feb. 14th, 2026 10:03 am
snickfic: Loki President (mood politics)
[personal profile] snickfic
Worry, Don't Panic, Over Trump's Efforts to Subvert the Elections by Andy Craig. A nice summary of Trump's possible angles of attack and their plausibility. Worth sharing with folks who think Trump is going to cancel the midterm election.

Stop Bullying J Cole (YouTube) by FD Signifier. I basically only know J Cole as the guy who stepped into the Drake vs Kendrick beef and then hurriedly stepped back out, but this made me feel a little defensive of him. I appreciate the uncool earnestness.

A London statue walk

Feb. 14th, 2026 04:38 pm
kazzy_cee: (Default)
[personal profile] kazzy_cee
Yesterday afternoon, we went on a walk to see some of the many statues in the City of London. The theme of the walk was 'Diverse London - City Public Art by Refugees and Immigrants' and focused on the stories behind the art produced by first-generation refugees and immigrants to the UK.  London has always been a home to immigrant communities, and whole areas of the city were built by those finding their homes here, so it's not surprising that we also have wonderful artists who have left their mark.

The day was drizzly and wet, but I took photos of the examples we saw, along with some of the other sculptures we passed, which form the Sculpture in the City trail. Under the cut for the photos and some history of the City of London area.

Read more... )

I really enjoy walking around when there's a theme to the walk, and it was fascinating to see so many sculptures in the City of London by people who have moved here for whatever reason. It was a shame about the weather, but I'm glad we went.

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